Sadly, that wasn't their worst offense today.
The girl comes to me a few minutes later and says, "Come to 206."
Umm... is there something I can help you with? Why do you need me to come to the room?
"Uhh... I don't know. My mom said come to the room."
As I turn the corner to get to the room, I hear it. OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, HE HIT ME, MA'AM HE HIT ME. First off, don't call me ma'am. Second of all, I don't care.
I was totally confused about what happened because there was ice on the ground, water splattered everywhere, the lady's face was wet, towels sprayed all over the balcony (OUTSIDE!) and the lady was hitting the guy and he wasn't resisting. I take domestic violence seriously, but let me tell you why I had suspicions about this situation:
1. The room was registered to the guy's name. His info, his photo ID on file. This was only the second time I had ever seen the woman.
2. The first time I saw the woman was on Thursday night, she came to the lobby to stink it up with her greasy hair and booze breath to chat on her cell phone for an hour. Twenty minutes into her conversation, I had to ask her to leave because I was tired of her yelling and ending all her sentences with "NIGGUHHHHHH." I swear to the pagan gods, she put the most drawn-out obnoxious emphasis on the the last syllable of the N-word that's ever been spoken by anyone ever. I don't have personal issues with the N-word, but for serious, self-respecting people don't use it in public... not ending in -ER or -AH or -uhhhhhh or any such variation. However you choose to pronounce it, I think it says a lot about your character to be saying it at all.
3. I've dealt with the guy a lot, and the only ridiculous thing he's done in over a month of staying here was hitting on my friend/coworker. He called her cute, said that she "needed to know," and then left. Hardly the weirdest thing either of us has seen.
When I got to the room I asked all involved parties to calm the fuck down and talk to me like grown-ups, because at 7:30am I really don't have much tolerance for crybabies. I knew something was up when the woman asked me to call the cops for her because 1) there's a working phone in her room, and 2) she has a working cell phone IN HER HAND. Personal preference and legal issues keep me from being able to make domestic violence complaints on someone else's behalf; as a third party, I can only make complaints about noise or express my concerns about someone's safety, but to file an actual domestic violence complaint only the involved parties can do that. So yeah... no matter how hard you beg, I won't ever make that phone call (people think that if I call for them, they don't have to report their name or personal information. this is false). When I told the woman she had to call the cops herself, her demeanor changed entirely. She dropped the cops issue and decided to focus her efforts on getting the guy out of the room.
The only problem: from a legal standpoint, is was HIS room. If anyone had to leave, it would be her.
The man had registered the room in his name, gave his ID for registration, his phone number, and posted the deposit on his own. There were no notes in his guest file about having additional guests in his room (it was assumed seeing as though he paid for double beds) but he never added a second name for access or asked for a second key. Before this morning, I had no idea that this woman had been staying in that particular room.
The woman had made some poor decisions, she had been paying the weekly rent on the room with her own cash, but again... her name was never registered. We had a history of cash payments on this room but still only one registered name; our policy and the law in general agree that the woman didn't really have many rights in this situation.
Here's a note to the ladies: DON'T BE STUPID. The woman came to me after a few minutes of cooling down to try to persuade me to have some mercy. She thought that she was doing a good thing by paying her man's rent (I could not believe my fucking ears) and she pleaded for me not to kick her out. To be honest, I don't want to kick anyone out ever... figure it out amongst yourselves. But you made some bad choices with your money. You're dumb. I don't care.
After all the dust was settled, the truth finally came out: the woman's children were late for school, the man doesn't have a car (and from what I can tell didn't really take much responsibility in taking care of the kids... they weren't his). He tried to wake the woman so she could drive her kids to school. She wouldn't wake. He tried again. Nothing. Not thinking clearly, the man thought it would be a good idea to splash an entire bottle of water on this woman's face to wake her up. Sure, they do it in the movies. BUT OMG WHO DOES THAT IRL. Obviously, she did not take it well. I don't know if it was shock from being awoken in such a manner or if she's just naturally dramatic, but she started screaming domestic violence and then proceeded to... engage in domestic violence. SHE had hit him then chased after him with a bucket of ice that had half melted (thus the ice and water and towels everywhere).
The guy said he was just trying to get her up so she would take her kids to school.
The woman said she was tired and didn't appreciate being woken up like that.
Both fair points, with an extremely outrageous overreaction.
I suggested that they separate voluntarily (because 7:30 is way too early to be dealing with the cops). The man stays in his room, the woman paid for a new room. They're on opposite ends of the building and I'm having a zero tolerance policy on either of their bullshittery.
Lesson from today: don't waterboard your girlfriend to wake her up.
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